Posts Tagged ‘Manchester United’
A vacuous husk of a woman - January 6th, 2010

H&M is not the place for sprint cyclists and hockey players. Seriously, even with my gut i can wear a slim-fit business shirt and the cut is good…but slim-fit trousers? I have to go up to twice my waist size before i can get my legs in without looking like the frontman of a britpop article band…

It feels like ages since i’ve written anything so i might be a little rusty. Sort of like Basketball at the moment. I’d love to see the German’s i play with, play a game with a full referee – it would be hilarious. It’s not a foul if you lose the ball people…these are called steals and turnovers. I’ve also read an incredible piece of tedium from Squires which may have dulled my creative abilities in telling a tale so apologies up front…it’s all on your shoulders mate.

And now my life has changed in oh so many ways… - December 11th, 2009

*** Warning ***

It’s another long one. Sorry, but it is a little treat for y’all. This is the blogging equivalent to a time capsule. Every computer i work on – work, home, laptop, etc. has text files scattered about, normally called something ingenious like blog.txt with one-liners and point-form arguments or stuff i want to write about. The idea being that occasionally i open it up and flesh some of them out into a post. Sometimes i can’t be arsed or don’t think they need further explanation which usually provides the shorter snippets at the beginnings of my posts.

I want to have Roonbeast’s baby - December 1st, 2009

Always be cautious around bow-legged people…they’re shifty. Nobody’s going around riding horses any more, so why are they bow-legged? Shifty i tell you.

While I’m on the topic of legs… your knees should not be the widest part of your legs. You’re supposed to have thigh muscles AND calf muscles. Seriously people, I will buy you a sandwich, it just looks fucking disgusting.

The Roadtrip Pt III – Three, is a magic number - October 30th, 2009

A decent nights rest and very little to drink the previous night meant we were feeling fine. We set off to enjoy Prague during the daytime. not phased by the seemingly ineffectiveness of the ‘Slavic plan’ it was decided that if we were to run into any nefarious creatures on the trams or in the streets silk would address me in Serbian – though sadly not on the Serbian finger phone – and i would respond with ‘Da’. What could possibly go wrong?

Desensitized to everything, what became of subtlety? - October 1st, 2009

You really get a lot of satisfaction publishing rants…comments left under posts…page hits…whole discussions on other peoples blogs about your posts without commenting on the post itself…
So i’m not allowed to discuss the c-bomb and now i can’t talk about fashion either. There’s just no keeping Squires’ high-brow audience happy is there. I might go back and edit my post (if i can’t write a new one) to include ugg-boots worn outside the house – that’s a definite no-no.

A priest, a hooligan and a bewildered Aussie walk into Old Trafford… - August 26th, 2009

I’m not finding things as funny any more as i continue to do an impersonation of someone that doesn’t care.
Another from the old Xanga days. It’s funny to read this actually to see that i once liked Tevez. That was before he tried to be bigger than our team. You can try to go against Fergie if you’re stupid enough Carlito, but don’t think for one second the fans will follow you down that road.

Bye Bye Ronnie - July 2nd, 2009

So Christiano has left, and Tevez should soon follow suit. Bit ambivalent to be honest. You don’t want to play for United then Fuck Off! You’re not bigger than this club. Good luck Real…he should fit in nicely with you lot.

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